The sign of a deeply rooted psychological problem.

So, I get home thinking that it will be a quiet night and will do some laundry, wrong. Stopped by to see my dad cause he had a Dr's appt today to check on his kidneys. He had some blood in his urine and 1 dr said that it might have a small infection. Turns out he has a form of cancer. I was hit hard but held my ground. No sense getting upset as soon as i heard, cause I needed to know more. I wanted to be strong for him as well.

Supposedly it's in it's early stages. Will have a minor op to determine what exactly it is. It's small and they think they can just do a scraping on his bladder to get rid of it. I still went to do my laundry, was getting time. We hung out at my place he mainly slept sitting up on my couch as I watched Pinks on Speed ch. I come home in between laundry duties. Loading washer and dryer and shit. He was wiped out cause they jammed a camera through his peehole and he said it takes a lot out of you.

After I went up to see Michele (sister) and talked to her about it. She didn't want to say too much and to keep herself distracted, she was cooking. I got some of the leftovers for lunch tomorrow. Garlic Shrimp in a tomato type sauce and some angel hair kinda pasta. Anyways..........

Doing what I can to hold myself together. It's really never racking considering I just lost my uncle Benn last July and then his wife, my aunt Alice this past Jan. Now to hear my dad being stricken with this fucking bullshit! I hear that there is a cancer cluster of people in Greenpoint. Something about an under the ground fuel leak or some shit.

Other than that, my boss stood me up for lunch. He forgot he already had an appt with his boss. He then asked me to get a drink after work to talk about crap in the office but i had to blow him off. He's not gonna be happy when I tell him everything. Hope they'll let me go for it and I can sit back and collect some unemployment for once. I've never collected. I've been working steady since 18 or 19. Been working summers since I was 15 or 16. I think I could use a break.
later